"I'll think about it." Pierre said, hanging up. David watched him cautiously, waiting to find out how the phone call had gone. Pierre took a deep breath. He definitely had a lot to think about. He stared at the ground for a good five minutes before he shifted his gaze and realized David was waiting patiently for information.
"She wants to meet me alone. Tomorrow." Pierre said simply. David took a deep breath in feeling the cool air slide through his chest and into his lungs;
"Do you want to talk about it?" David offered. He really didn't know what else to say. This was Pierre's battle and he could be there to help him and hold his hand along the way, but he couldn't fight it for him.
"I don't know. I mean, I really don't want to see her. I don't have any good feelings towards her anymore, but..." Pierre sighed and looked down at his lap and David closed his eyes in realization.
"Pierre, if that's true, then don't do it. Don't do it for me. This should be your decision. But you should know that no matter what you choose, I can't stay here with you. I'm going to go back to my parents."
"You should. You should be with your parents. That's exactly where you should be. You don't belong here, in this world, with me. You should go." Pierre stood up, keeping his eyes glued to the ground.
"David, please. I won't be responsible for ruining your life." He said. It amazed Pierre his voice didn't catch, as he walked away with tears streaming his face. David sat in shock and watched him go. Neither of them had a full understanding of what they'd just done. It felt right and it felt wrong to both of them. Pierre wandered, David sat, lost, and neither of them knew where they belonged in the world.
The sun was setting and David still sitting on the park bench staring at nothing. He still couldn't put the pieces together in his mind. How could Pierre be... gone? He couldn't believe that one boy could mean so much to him, so soon. He looked up to the sky, red with the sun going in, and it hit him. Pierre was gone. Pierre had left him. Pierre had... Pierre had left him.
David jumped frantically off the bench and ran in the direction that Pierre had gone, hours ago. He ran until he was out of the park and on the streets and then he started yelling.
"PIERRE!" "PIEEEERRE!" The tears came soon and he staggered across town, yelling and crying. Many people he passed looked at him funny, or whispered. He heard one girl telling her friend to look at the 'crazy drunk kid.' but he wasn't drunk. He was desperate. He needed Pierre.
Pierre didn't know where to go. He'd been wandering aimlessly on the streets since he'd left David that afternoon. He didn't want to go back to Sebastien's house but he couldn't make himself go back home. Jeff's maybe, but he was tired of being a guest. He was tired of not having a place to go. He was tired of turning peoples lives upside down. He was just really, really, tired. And he was dying without David. Sure it had only been a few hours, but how long could he go on like this? He loved David. He sighed out loud. He loved David, and that was exactly why he had to stay away. For a minute, Pierre thought he heard David's voice calling out his name. He really was going crazy without him...
David finally slid into an alley, putting his back against the wall, and slid to the ground. "Pie-e-eeere..." He sobbed quietly, defeated. He would never find Pierre in this town, and even if he did, that didn't mean Pierre would stay with him. Pierre had left, and he wasn't coming back.
Pierre finally stopped walking and sat down a vacant bus bench. He felt a tear run down his cheek, but wiped it away quickly. He was doing this for David, he was doing what was best for him. David would go home and reconcile with his parents and move on, find someone new. Someone who could be more for him than Pierre ever could. But that didn't make it stop hurting right now...
Pierre's phone buzzed in his pocket and for a second, he thought about ignoring it. But it could be Sebastien, and he was probably worried...
He looked at the screen, and after only a moment's hesitation, answered.
"Whatsup?" He said automatically.
"You tell me. I've been warning you for four years Pierre, and you didn't listen. Now I'm the one who has to clean up the mess." He said angrily. Pierre had to admit he did feel a little guilty, but he was the one who'd left! He should be the one feeling guilty, not Pierre.
"I don't have to listen to you anymore, you don't control me. We haven't spoken in months and I'm not about to change that now." Pierre said, surprising himself with how confident he felt, being as in reality, he was shaking like the captain of the titanic.
"Pie-" Pierre panicked as the voice on the other end of the phone kept talking, and hung up. Soon he felt his whole body shuddering uncontrollably with everything going on at the moment and he bowed his head and felt the sobs break into his breath as his tears began to slowly soak the sidewalk... and it started to rain.
Pierre and David sat, both, and felt the rain slick down their hair and soak their clothing and faces, and the cried. They cried for each other, they cried for their losses, they cried for their friends, their families, and their lives.
Sebastien lay on his back on his bed, tossing a basketball in the air and catching it before it hit his face. He didn't cry that afternoon. He knew he had to be stable. Besides David and Pierre, he was really the only stable one around and they didn't even count because they were guests. Pierre and David. Sebastien didn't even have time to think about it. He'd always known Pierre was gay but knowing was a totally different thing than really seeing it. As far as he knew, this was Pierre's first boyfriend. Seb was happy for them. Someone deserved a little happiness in their lives. Seb shrugged. He wasn't too worried about them. If anything, maybe they'd get tired of being in the nut house and went home to their own families. "OW" Seb said out loud, jolting upright, as blood fled from his nose. He picked up the basketball and chucked it against the door, leaving a dent in the wood. Of course, it wasn't the ball's fault he'd forgot to catch it... but he couldn't handle taking on even that little burden right now or he might crash. Anyway, what mattered now was that for the time being, Angie was safe, David and Pierre were safe, and he was safe. So how could he really complain?
David tilted his neck and felt his head rest on the cold hard bricks of the alley wall. He took a deep breath and felt the cool air rush freely into his lungs as the rain washed away the emotion from the surface of his skin. Pierre was gone and David knew in his heart that there was no bringing him back. At least not now, not tonight. Pierre needed time, and David would give it to him. So he pulled himself up off the ground, and wiped his eyes. Because he wouldn't cry. Because he and Pierre would be together again. He would fight for it until the day he died. So he zipped up his hoodie further, and started walking towards his parent's house.
It took him a good 45 minutes to get there, being as how he wasn't even sure where he'd ended up in his search for the man who had left him, but soon enough he was standing on the front steps of the house that he still couldn't bring himself to think of as anything else but home. And he rang the doorbell.
Pierre wanted to be with David more than anything. But he knew he couldn't. David was probably already starting to move on from Pierre and soon he could live a happy, healthy life without him, the way it should be. So he swallowed his pride and started walking down the street towards his parents' house, because who needs dignity when you've lost the person you love. Not 15 minutes later, he was there. Standing on the front porch of the house that looked so familiar, but still, no matter how hard he tried, could not raise any emotion within him, and would never, even if it was where he lived, be his home again. But still, he rang the doorbell.
"David, you're our son, and we love you..." His mother started as she sat on the couch across from him. "But I'm worried. You latched on to that... that person, so quickly, so... so fiercely. I know now that you were just confused, and that's why you have left him to come home, but this confusion could cause you to become overwhelmed, and well... I just think... you know... when a person becomes overwhelmed with emotions, they can break down, and when you... well... I just don't..." David felt his mouth drop open slightly as his eyes narrowed.
"Mom, stop. I know exactly what you're trying to say so don't bother saying it. You're wrong. I'm not confused. I am gay and I love Pierre. I love him more than I've ever loved anything and we will be together again. I love him. I'm not confused and even if I was, that doesn't mean I'm going to relapse!" David felt anger bubbling to the surface as he jumped to his feet. If there was one thing he couldn't take it was people treating him like he was broken. It's called recovery for a reason. He looked into the face of the woman that was supposed to be there to provide comfort, and saw only narrow-minded bigotry. "You know what mom? I think it's time you learned a thing or two about life. SO YOU'RE SCARED IS THAT IT?! You scared mom? Scared your son's gonna lock himself in the bathroom, puking up his dinner or making out with his BOYFRIEND? WELL YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO ACCEPT THAT IF THOSE THINGS MAKE YOU A FAILURE AS A MOTHER THAN CONGRATULATIONS YOU'RE A FAILURE. But I am still your son. So I'll be here. I'll be in my room when you're ready to open your eyes." And with that, David stormed to his room, leaving his parents in a whirlwind of confusion and anger.
David slammed the door and fell back onto his bed, swinging his feet up. He wasn't going to cry. Not for them. If he was going to cry for someone, it would be Pierre and he and Pierre weren't over so there was no reason to cry. Now he could only feel anger, and... something else. Through the anger, he felt something, almost... desire. A strong pull in his throat that he hadn't felt in a very long time. One that could not be condensed, or controlled, only satisfied. Like an itch you just can't scratch. And he knew it was over. Everything he'd worked for, gone. Down the drain, no pun intended. And he made his way to his little sound proof bathroom off the side of his room. After the conversation he'd just had with his parents, David didn't feel safe. Or private. So, just to cover his tracks, he turned on the water to create the illusion he was having a shower, one of many tricks he knew all too well. And then he slid to the floor in front of the all too familiar, perfect porcelain bowl... and emptied his fears, his cares, his worries. His fingers drew out the sludge of his relationship problems with Pierre, of his worries about how people would react to his being gay, of his fears for the little girl he'd just met at Sebastien's, at everything circling any thoughts of his parents, he let it all spill out of him. And then he flushed, wiped, and went back to his room, falling easily once again into the routine. Like he'd never stopped at all.
He walked into his room, and looked into the mirror above his desk, and saw all the things he did before. And he wondered how he ever could have been so stupid as to believe them when they told him he looked "fine." He was disgusting. He saw skin spilling out of areas where skin shouldn't be, and he hated it. He would get rid of it at all costs, and then he could stop again. This wasn't a relapse, just a... a solution. He knew from his last doctor's visit that he currently weighed 135 pounds. He just needed to lose... maybe 50 pounds. And then he would be okay again. Then Pierre would take him back. No wonder Pierre left him, if this is how he's been looking lately. He was a whale. But just 50 pounds would do it. He would get Pierre back. And his parents wouldn't care, they would love him again. They would be happy to have a thin, okay looking son. He would be worth it.
"Yeah!" Sebastien said enthusiastically. "So, uh... that game looks really fun... can I play?" He asked, smiling and raising his eyebrows hopefully. Pierre was angry. How could this boy think he could stop the game like that and then expect them to let him play?!
"Sur-" Jeff started enthusiastically, but Pierre cut him off.
"No! We don't want you to play with us!" Pierre said. He spat the words at the boy, who's eyes got wide and filled with tears. Pierre just brushed it off, not realizing what he'd done. Then went back to the game.
"ARRGH!" Pierre said, raising his hand in a hook towards Jeff who looked, almost sad. He didn't look like he wanted to play anymore. And that's when a different, more familiar voice came from below.
"PIERRE CHARLES BOUVIER, GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW." His mother demanded. He looked over at Jeff, who didn't look confused, but Pierre knew he was, because Pierre himself was confused. He jumped down from the climber, followed by Jeff and looked up at his mother, who bent down to look him in the eye.
"WHY DID YOU TELL THAT BOY HE COULDN'T PLAY WITH YOU?" His mother asked loudly. If her voice had gone up one octave, she would have been yelling. Pierre's eyes got wide, and suddenly he was scared. Not guilty of denying the boy, but scared of getting in trouble. He didn't say a word, simply because he knew nothing he said would be acceptable for his mother.
She looked him stern in the eye, anger flaming around her, speaking quieter, but slowly, which only emphasized her words that much more.
"Since when do we hurt people's feelings on purpose?"
The way she slowly spoke the words, letting them sink into Pierre's skin, and crawling under it, made Pierre realize what he had done. He'd made the boy feel bad, left out. All he wanted to do was play the game...
Even as a child, Pierre knew that nothing he said to his mother now could compensate for making the boy cry.
So without another word to her, he slowly turned and crossed the park to where the boy was sitting on a bench with his mother, swinging his legs, looking down at his lap as she was asking him if he was really sure he wanted to go home.
"Um... hi..." Pierre said nervously, twiddling his thumbs, his eyes flipping back and forth from the ground, to the boy and his mother. The boy's head shot up, looking at Pierre with sad eyes. Pierre looked down at feet for a moment, in shame of how he'd made the boy feel.
When neither the boy, nor his mother said anything to Pierre, he knew it was up to him to speak.
"I'm sorry about what I said. I didn't mean it. I'm real sorry, and if you want to come play pirates with us, that will be really fun..." Pierre said, and even though five minutes ago he'd wanted nothing less than to play with this boy, he really wished the boy would say yes.
But why would he? Pierre was so mean to him...
But it didn't matter. Pierre knew that when he saw the boy's eyes light up, and he smiled. "Okay!" He said excitedly, jumping off the bench, and nothing else had mattered. The two ran off back to the playground to play with Jeff... to play Pirates...
That happened twelve years ago, and to this day, Pierre, Sebastien, and Jeff were best friends. If his mother hadn't said that to him, who knows where he'd be today.
Pierre's mind snapped back to reality. He took a step towards his mother, looked her in the eye, and spoke slowly...
"Since when do we hurt people's feelings on purpose?" He asked her, and as her eyes got wide with anger and shock, he pushed past her and walked straight down the stairs, and out the door.
He wasn't going to David's, but he knew his mother would think he was, which was exactly what he wanted her to think. But regardless of what she thought, he turned in the other direction and walked two streets over to Sebastien's house.
When Seb's mom let him in, Pierre greeted her, and walked straight to Seb's bedroom, where he found him hanging out with Jeff.
Jeff's face lit up with excitement, and Seb's with welcome, given that he didn't know anything about the David thing yet.
"Hey man, how was your date?" Jeff teased, nodding his head toward Pierre. Pierre smiled and rolled his eyes as he closed Sebastien's bedroom door.
Seb looked back and forth between his friends, confused.
"What?! What date?!" He asked somewhat excitedly, somewhat hurt that he obviously was left out of the loop.
Pierre rolled his eyes again. "Nothing..." He said in a dramatic voice that clearly said Shut up, you're going to get my hopes up about this.
"Oh you didn't hear?" Jeff said playfully. "P's gettin' ass!" He finished laughing excitedly as Pierre picked a pillow off Seb's bed and threw it at him. He's taking this a bit far...
"Dude, shut up, you know that's not true." He said smiling as Jeff nodded his head in defeat.
"Yet..." Jeff muttered under his breath. It was so quiet Pierre barely heard it, but he did, and so did Seb. Not that it mattered, he planned to tell his friend about what was going on anyways, he just never got a chance.
"WHAT?! Dude, what am I missing here?! Who is it, what's going on?!" Seb asked confused, hurt, and happy, all at the same time. Pierre knew Seb would be happy for him, which made him feel kind of bad about waiting so long to tell him. But it's not like he could change the past, so he might as well tell him now...
"Okay, well... his name's-" Pierre started.
"IT'S DAVID DESROSIERS, HIS NEIGHBOUR!" Jeff blurted excitedly and honestly, Pierre thought he was acting a bit childish.
He sighed. "Would you like to tell the story?" Pierre asked sarcastically.
"Well actually..." Jeff said hopefully, and Pierre rolled his eyes and tilted his head at his friend, but when Jeff only gave him a more hopefull, sheepish look, Pierre sighed in defeat.
"Go ahead..." He said smiling at his friend. He really was lucky to have his best friends be so cool with this... you know, his sexuality...
"OKAY! SO-" Jeff started, and he rambled on about everything about how Pierre'd liked David since 9th grade, to how they'd walked to school, to finding the outfit at the mall, to Pierre sleeping with David, to promising to go back to David's this morning.
"Which brings us to the present, where our best friend was just about to tell us how it went!" Jeff said excitedly, passing the figurative conversational torch to Pierre.
"I didn't go..." He said.
Pierre had barely gotten the words out when Jeff's eyes practically popped out of his face.
"WHAT?! WHY WOULDN'T YOU GO?!" He panicked, and Seb slapped him in the chest, to say 'stop yelling in my house before my mom hears you.' Jeff gave him an apologetic look, then flipped his attention back to Pierre, who was sitting in Seb's desk chair rather than on the bed with his friends.
"My mom fuckin flipped. She heard we ditched the other day and started going on about how David's ruining my life and she doesn't want me to see him, and I basically told her to go fuck herself and came over here." Pierre explained. "But I did talk to David and he said he wants to walk to school with me tomorrow."
Jeff and Seb both smiled wide, hardly controlling themselves.
"We're real happy for you man..." Seb said, making Pierre glad he had one sane friend who wasn't going to practically fangirl over his love life. Pierre smiled appreciatively, and once again, felt eternally grateful that he'd gone back over that day to talk to the boy in the park.
Pierre didn't go home that night. He stayed the night at Sebastien's, and so did Jeff. Not necesarily because he wanted to spend time with his friends, but more to freak out his mother. And it worked.
Pierre walked through the front door, and was planning to go straight to his room, if his mother hadn't come storming around the corner into the front entrance the second the doorknob turned. He immediately rolled his eyes, and tilted his head, exhaling dramatically, trying desperately to show her he didn't care what she had to say, and waiting for her to say something. What was she even doing up waiting for him at 6:30 AM?
"Do not give me that look, you directly disobeyed my orders!" She spit at him furiously.
"Okay, first of all, I'm not a dog." Pierre started in a bored, unimpressed tone. "And Second, I was at Sebastien's phsyco." He said, and with that, turned and left his mother standing stunned at the bottom of the stairs.
As he closed his bedroom door, and found his bed, he lay down instantly, a little stunned himself that he had just said that to his mother. Not that she hadn't been showing some pretty hurtful behaviour herself, but still...
Anyways, he didn't have time to think about it. He had to get ready for school...
Get ready to see David.
When the familiar squeek of the door in his third period class once again drifted through the room, Pierre turned his head to see David walking in. His eyes flicked to the empty seat next to him, then to the board, where he was determined to keep them. He didn't even look when he felt David slide into the seat next to him. Actually, it was tempting, given how surprised he was David even sat with him. After all, after ditching Pierre, leaving him waiting outside his house for fourty-five minutes, and making him late for his first class, sitting with him didn't seem like something David would want. The only thing that confused Pierre now, was did David lead him on... or was it all in his head?
In his peripheral vision, Pierre saw David trying to lean into Pierre's line of vision, but he didn't even flinch.
"Hi..." David asked sounding only half guilty. Pierre sighed internally and turned to look at... at the boy's sad, perfect, beautiful, eyes. And suddenly he just really hoped David had a good excuse, because he didn't want to be mad at him. He wasn't done with him.
"Hi..." Pierre said quietly, looking back at the board. He may have been hoping to forgive David, but that didn't mean he had yet. David didn't say anything for about a minute, taking a breath in every now and again to start talking, and Pierre could tell he was trying to find the right words. And oh how Pierre hoped the words would be right. Because he really was upset siat what David had done to him, and if he didn't even have a good reason... Pierre didn't know what he would do.
"Look Pierre, I'm really sorry. I had a doctor's appointment during first period, just a checkup. But my mom didn't tell me about it until it was time to rush out the door and... and I feel terrible." David said. His tone had changed drastically and Pierre could tell he really meant it. He looked up at the other boy and smiled weakly.
"Alright, it's cool. Maybe we can hang out tonight?" He asked hopefully. Oh great, now I sound desperate and clingy. Awesome. Go Pierre.
David smiled a genuine smile at the request. "Sure, how 'bout your place?" He asked. Pierre smiled and opened his mouth to say yes, when he remembered that might not be such a good idea. The last thing he needed right now was to have David in the same room with his mother.
"Um... actually, your place would be better, if that's okay?" He asked. Pierre tried desperately to keep his mind away from thoughts about how rude and needy and idiotic he sounded. And it worked, only because David started talking again, consuming all of Pierre's thoughts.
"Yeah, it's not problem. We can walk there together after school... you know, since I missed our date this morning." David said smiling playfully. Pierre laughed and nodded his head, and was going to say something more, when the second bell rang, indicating class had started. As he sat, staring blankly at the board, pretending he was listening to the introduction to the lesson, he let his heart soar at the word date coming out of David's mouth about the two of them. Even if it were a joke.
The rest of the day was spent with Pierre's mind wandering in and out of conversations and classes, always finding it's way to David. By fourth period, his last class, he was practically jumping out of his seat ready to go meet David and walk to his house.
He was so anxious waiting for the bell to ring, that he barely even noticed when it actually did ring. But it did, and he jumped from his desk, and actually ran down the stairs to his locker, grabbing his bag, and rushing to the front of the school where David was already waiting.
Pierre slowed his pace as he approached David, so as to not look too desperate or show how much he'd been anticipating the moment. After all, even though Pierre knew David was gay, David still didn't know Pierre was gay. To him they were just friends.
"Hey!" David said smiling brightly as Pierre approached. Pierre smiled back.
"Hey..." He said tilting his head, and taking mental note of how perfectly cute David was. Then something else caught his eye. Right now, they might just be friends, but someday that door might open, and Pierre had to earn points.
"Hey, let me take these..." He said sweeping up the stack of heavy books David was carrying. David's eye got a glimmer in them then, and Pierre smiled as David thanked him, and they started walking.
They walk to David's house was great, they just talked about everything they could think of, including the CD David had leant Pierre, and Pierre told him trying to be inconspicuous about it, how much he loved the song 'wonderwall.' The one that had reminded him of David...
David responded in a way you might expect, but there was something about his response that, even if only for a second, made Pierre think maybe David liked him...
But that was ridiculous. It was just a song.
Pierre still couldn't believe he was friends with David... David Desrosiers, the boy next door who he'd liked for two years.
It felt amazing just to walk with him...
Then as they approached David's front door, everything changed. As it flew open before them, Pierre could hardly believe what happened...
"YOU'VE BEEN MUSICALLY DEPRIVED!" He practically yelled the words at Pierre but it wasn't hard to tell he was excited more than he was angry.
Pierre laughed in amusement and confusion as David jumped up and moved to his desk, digging through a drawer until he found what he was looking for.
"You have to take this home and listen to it!" He said excitedly as he sat back down, facing Pierre. Pierre took the CD case from David, and looked at it. The front was blank. Must be homemade...
He opened his mouth to say something before David beat him to it.
"Will you come over tomorrow and tell me what you think?!" He asked excitedly. A wide smile crossed Pierre's face... not only was David officially the cutest thing in the whole world... but he'd invited Pierre to come over again.
Pierre laughed at how excited David was, the apropriate output for all the emotions he was feeling at the time. "Yeah, sure." He said grinning so hard his cheeks hurt. David squeeled and threw his arms around Pierre's neck, sounding again, like a child. He definitely never thought David was this feminine...
David settled back into his chair and got serious for a minute. "You know, it's weird that we've spent so little time together, cause I already feel like I can be myself around you... and that doesn't happen for me a lot." He said looking down, embarrased. And that's when it hit him. Pierre was amazed he hadn't seen it before.
It was possible that nobody knew... not even David... but Pierre could tell.
David was as gay as the rainbow.
Pierre smiled uncontrollably at this new discovery, and continued his conversation with David as if he'd never figured it out at all. After awhile, they were talking about everything from friends, to school, to music, to sports, to anything else that came up. And it was safe to say... David and Pierre were friends.
Pierre checked his watch. Ten minutes past midnight. He could hear that their parents and friends had moved inside downstairs and was glad his parents were getting along with Mr. and Mrs. Desrosiers. Pierre let that thought drift off as he looked around the room, fiddled with the CD in his hands, unsure of what to do...
David had fallen asleep only a few minutes ago. Not that he blamed him, for he was having trouble staying awake himself... and Da... Davi...
Pierre really was tired.
I'll just shut my eyes for a minute...
Pierre pushed himself down so he was lying across two bean bag chairs and closed his eyes...
Then opened them again to the morning light. His eyes popped open and he checked his watch. 11 AM.
How could he have fallen asleep?! David would think he was creepy! He'd overstayed his welcome! He'd- wait... why did his breathing feel so heavy? Pierre didn't know why, but he was almost afraid to find out as he slowly tilted his head down to see wha-
TO SEE DAVID LYING ACROSS HIS CHEST SLEEPING, ONE ARM WRAPPED AROUND HIM.
Pierre's hear jumped into a frenzy! He... was... sleeping... with David! He was cuddling with David!
Pierre wanted nothing more but to jump up and scream from the rooftops. Suddenly he weighed two pounds and had a perfect life! Nothing mattered in the world. It most likely happened by accident in their sleep... but it didn't matter. He'd dreamt of waking up next to this boy for two years. And even if this was the first and only time it would happen... he'd finally gotten the chance to experience it.
Pierre allowed his smile to spread itself until he could swear it was touching his ear... and as the excitement was enveloping him, David's eyes fluttered open...
Pierre's eyes widened and his breathing became more shallow... then he remembered David was lying on him.
He was innocent here. A small smile crossed David's lips at the morning light, then Pierre watched his features closely as he came to the realization he was lying on somebody.
Pierre waited patiently for David to wake up... when David exploded.
He jumped off of Pierre and backed up, looking around defenselessly and Pierre just became confused.
"B-b-b-but... no I.. I- I'm not... I'm not... g... I'm... I'M NOT GAY!" David stuttered, tears starting to flow from his eyes.
Pierre stood up, but kept his distance, confused, and instantly heartbroken and scared.
"David nobody said you were! You just rolled over in your sleep!" Pierre tried to rationalize with him, and a look came over David's features. Pierre took a deep breath as they both tried to calm and make sense of the situation. David slowly nodded and made his way to the couch, curling up in a ball, pulling his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. Pierre stayed standing and David looked up at him with teary, apoligetic eyes.
"I'm sorry Pierre. You're not gay either, I know that... I just... I don't know what just came over me." David said, curling even further into himself. Pierre was right. There was no doubt in his mind now that David Desrosiers was gay.
"David..." Pierre started, stepping closer to the couch. He took a deep breath, hoping he wasn't crossing a line, but willing to take the risk. "You are gay David, aren't you?" He asked solemnly.
David's head slowly raised and the helpless look on his face as the tears started to flow gave Pierre his answer.
Pierre moved to the couch, wrapping his arms around David, who instantly took comfort in Pierre. Pierre wanted nothing more than to look David in the eye, and kiss him. But he knew he couldn't. David wasn't ready, not even near ready, and right now Pierre just had to be there for him as a friend.
And he would do just that. He would wait for David forever...
Or at least until his cell phone beeped with a text from his mom asking him to come home.
David wiped his tears and nodded his head toward the door. Pierre didn't want to go and it broke his heart to leave David like this. But he knew he had to...
"I'll be back as soon as I can." He promised, pleading forgiveness with his eyes. David just smiled weakly and nodded, and Pierre left without another word.
When he walked in the door, he felt aweful. He didn't know why he'd felt so guilty for leaving David, but he did. Not that he had a choice...
"PIERRE CHARLES BOUVIER WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!" Demanded an invincible voice, as his mother stormed around the corner into view.
"I stayed over at David's...?" Pierre asked, honestly confused about her anger. She knew where he was, why was she so angry?
He looked up at her to see her eyes nearly popping out of her head.
Oh... that's why...
Pierre sighed dramatically and rolled his eyes.
"Mom, nothing happened..." He said honestly, looking at her like she was being ridiculous... which she was...
Pierre could see her searching angrily for the words inside her head and it was all he could do not to laugh, picturing smoke coming out of her ears, her face turning red, and her shoulders slumped like some cartoon. But he held it in long enough for her to realize she had no real defense against him, and sent him to his room where he was told Jeff was waiting.
Oh god... what would he tell Jeff?
'Oh hey, yeah my night went okay I guess. I slept with David and found out he was secretely gay. But besides that, pretty uneventful.' No, he couldn't say that for the obvious fact that it could be very misinterperated. But then what would he say?
He took a deep breath as he opened the door and saw Jeff jump off of his bed as he entered and closed the door behind him.
"DUDE what the hell?! Where have you been?!" He asked, not angrily, but curiously. After all, Pierre was supposed to call him last night when he got home from David's...
"Um... David's..." He explained nervously, looking Jeff in the eye, seeing excitement cross his features.
"Dude... did you...?" Jeff turned his head, eyes locked on Pierre, grinning like an idiot and Pierre knew exactly what he was asking.
Pierre wanted to sigh but instead it came out as a laugh. He couldn't help it.
"No man. I just met him. Or, at least just started talking to him... nah we just slept." He said. Jeff looked disappointed but at the same time was eyeing Pierre closely.
"What else...?" He asked slowly still eyeing Pierre. Pierre thought about it for a minute... David obviously didn't want this getting out. He'd started crying when he said it out loud...
But it was just Jeff. And Jeff wouldn't tell anybody. And if he ever did get the urge to, the most he'd ever do is tell Sebastien who could keep a secret better than anyone Pierre had ever known.
This time Pierre really did sigh... "He's gay." He said, and he really couldn't help but let the smile break out across his face as he said the words. David was gay... he liked boys... and maybe someday, he could like Pierre...
"NICE" Jeff said enthusiastically bounding over and giving Pierre a hard pat on the back. Pierre laughed and nodded and made his way over to sit on his bed, where Jeff joined him.
"So... are you gonna ask him out?" Jeff said smiling, elbowing Pierre in the arm. Pierre smiled too and rolled his eyes.
"Nah, he's not ready for that yet. And realistically, if he were, we're so different. He would never like me..." Pierre said, trying to get the words out without changing the whole mood of the conversation. But it was true. As much as he liked to believe David could someday fall in love with him, they had practically nothing in common... he wasn't the kind of guy David would be into.
Jeff opened his mouth to protest, then closed it again, rethinking his words.
"What's that?" He asked curiously changing the subject. Pierre looked down, totally forgetting.
"Oh yeah... it's a CD. David leant it to me, told me listen to it." Pierre said trying not to let the loving smile cross his features. And failing miserably.
He looked back up at Jeff, who's eyebrows were raised. He took notice of Pierre's smile at the CD. "Dude, you're in deep with this kid, eh?" He asked, his voice sounding both happy, and concerned for his friend. Pierre looked down at his lap as he let the words register. Jeff was right... he'd never felt like this about anybody before.
"Yeah man... I am..." He told him honestly, not meeting his eyes for even a second.
"Well hey, let's listen to this CD then!" Jeff said loudly, jumping off the bed. He was always good at setting lighter tones. It was a Jeff thing.
Pierre laughed and handed him just the disc, flipping over the case to see a small, perfect, beautiful scrawl has listed the tracks on the back.
The first track, a song called wonderwall, started playing... it was actually really great. Better than any of the music he listened to.
Then as he listened to the lyrics more, he thought of David...
"Maybe... you're gonna be the one that saves me...
And after all... you're my wonderwall..."
Could he? Could Pierre save David?
After all, it was pretty obvious that David wasn't happy living a lie...
Pierre took a deep breath and let the next track start. He and Jeff sat in practical silence through the CD as Pierre let every word and every melody sink deep into his skin...
The music was great. Honestly, he felt shallow for listening to all the crap on the radio about drinking and fucking chicks.
That wasn't music... this was...
No wonder David liked it so much.
Among Pierre's favourite tracks were listed as "Therapy" By a band called All Time Low, "Hold On" By someone named Good Charlotte, and on a lighter note, a song called "Remind Yourself" by a guy called Tyler Kyte.
David's music was just as beautiful as he was...
Jeff smiled at Pierre, taking note of his friend's unspoken thoughts.
"Okay I'm leaving. And you're going to David's..." Jeff said, and without another word, he was up, and out the door. Pierre smiled to himself and took a deep breath. Yes. He was. He would shower and change, and then go back to David's.
Excitement enveloped him as he anticipated seeing the boy again...
The sweet, perfect, beautiful, gay, boy...